I laid there an hour or two wondering how it was i lost that frown and i feel your presence lingering on the bed where you lay down,shifting pretty colors and scenery beget an image that all looks green to me.everytime i speak out slip softly spoken lies that im painting in the stars on a canopy of sky,and everything i see is reminiscent of my dreams though its hard to understand with the lazy way i look at things.why should i even look out my window its only the world out there and i know where your outside loving and living,while i dont know much about giving you what it is you need but what if i please you,would you even miss me?would you even miss me at all?Ill stand away just to bat off these flies can you see the ebbing shine in my tinted eyes?One of these days im buying for you the happiness ive been meaning to

Waltz on the withering spirals of wind,enjoy the sounds of the watery weather your scarred leather skin has never looked better,turn out the lights at sea and wash away a wistful sailors dream,a clandestine dedication,avowal of loving forever unfulfilled.espy exploding stars with excited consternation,we whine and wonder and cackle and conjure a tumultous ruckus among the willow arms that shade us,toss a cockle claterring on the careless air,you scared for your soul caught up in a clawing flock of whooperwills,will you sell me short?for youvehad your fill of this derelict distress and death begets thy will be done.and some days seem like an unseen embrace,some beauty awaits you with complacent gaze,some faces are lined with the traces of their screams unsung,and someday youll be so fucking grateful for such forlorn finesse.another sick player in a game inexplicably fixed.these surrounding boundaries are practical lies produced to suffuse us and keep vague truths alive,and that paradise sought over hills heaths highways and cities of concrete fields is a speculative quest that yeilds far more then is often perceived,for heaven is a bearing closer than it may seem,and i came so close.nausicaa's song calls us here,and straining we hear her tearful cry echo the life bestowed us among the chaos of shadow and light, all that is are fragrant and outspoken whispers of wind, the sounds of our fates that clatter resounding then one winding down in a flutter will fade, afraid of said darkness, we must embrace the purity of corruption,cleanse hateful confusion and distill the dichotomies that render us no peace, and live, and die, as i, as we, see fit. Beauty and terror coalesce, one cells behest to all the rest and the whole beholden to it in return, and the earth that burns begets us as we learn and steadily tread the paths long dead now awakened, and taking from others in boundless coagulation, in hateful dispute and loving relation, we contribute our whole as a part of the unseen face, the infinite plane, above and below and within and what is all that was, is, or will be. so become who you are and fight hard in ambitious desire for survival, reside withall on the cusp of life, the precipice which we, ever resolute, evermore will cling to to, sing atop and aloud, freeing our voices in the canyon from hither far and long, carried to its boundaries, clutching at whats forever beyond,and admire this for what it is, in essence, existence. for one day soon,occuring now forever since always, a dark blustering zither appears, to drag me off to the dark whence we came to which we all will return, pure and unwashed carrying nothing save love, to the fecund void bearing our weight as we cross,and we,the whole part of our being, the entity ever striving far-reaching onward indefinitely,will nestle and settle enmity unbereaved,reach our peak in lively song at least and at last to witness the death and rebirth of our own anonymity

little dipper overflown spills shaded rainbows across the land,phosphorous shores are glistening hear the whispering roar atop high tide of a risen horizon,smoke billows and twists into misty rings,my eyes shrouded espy the morning star suffused in wet sand and the image of evil looked so nice in that light, i let her feed me those pale-faced lies.we all know that time is but a line meant to express our deteriorating lives,what doesnt this world do to hurt you and evermore potent is the emotion amalgam, surging pain ruptures the veins tied to my tried and tumultuous brain made into cold and soulless steel,deprived of the tool i call energy all i see are contrived plots to eliminate decisions,my creation is now a weapon of no use to me,who could be proud of such destruction?a friendly discussion becomes disgusting and my words arent what they mean,theyre only the sweat from my brow and the prow of my ghost ship.i cling in desperate dispair to an unclean and concealed living dream a river running fish,a bird on the air, a mare in the desert all own the nobility we futiley wish we could earn.and i think not a thing could be better, than thinking of you and lying in wait for nothing forever.we waded down mountain sides screaming hollering the song she sang oh what wondrous life you bring and better living through chemistry heals the pain of my apathy and kills all my evil motives.and over once again is this reminiscent bliss the spark of life and inspiration to one listless stalwart sentinel guarding an abandoned station,sees in his mind the subtle shift of the tide and the lessening chop of an immense and churning wave whose dark and deep troughs do seep bubble and tumble and fade into a dim,starlit night where water becomes sky and you and i are seen in a new light, a magnificent vision so beautiful it could kill you.and on the train ride home i was finally shown the love id been trying to hide,oh liquid life spilled through my fingers let me quietly linger in these fleetingly relentless seconds for ive never wanted to fight,which is why i eat yet still have hunger, and i own an invented method meant to express an inarticulate care for the fresh air that i breath im honored to be hear and to see what is clearly this instinctive plans purpose,and as i ride colored skies i think of your eyes open in my open arms

what i wouldnt do for you is nothing less than precisely anything else ive been half awake dreaming, waiting,watching working and searching for words to honor loving something as unseen as a stone or a fish sunk deep below the swirling surface of the brine.or a wish worth a penny whose shine gently lights the bubbling loud fountain amidst the crazed hasty noise of a city street whose emotions so subtly shift beneath the skin like honey dripping that is not so sweet as the smile my heart needs nor the vision of white heat which it feeds on.while i must have come to far to call her my darling that face is held fast to a burned and bleeding heart.burdened by a void called love that regards no sense nor fear nor end nor start,mounting force behind every eye,all those lonely minds calling out to one and the other seeking to bury each pain every new lover.but between you and i not the haunting goodbyes are ours nor the listless resentment.im swept in the tide of your heavensent presence,what a wonder and a light to behold,the love of my soul and the life i have known.putting letters into words writing letters to yourself,firecracker snaps and tricks to trap your heart,convection cells tell me to sell myself short.lucid i spy an elated smile slipped thru two lips of a daffodil of ethereal splendor,grown in a wild grass knoll sewn with thistled burrs is a girl with a world filled with escalating tests of sharp wit and a hardened will.i cannot love her as i have,memories held still and dead and reviewed in the confines of a cold and wallowing bed float on sea of gray days,at your behest ill give my best to stow away in boxes with the label innocent days,stored away in your chest full of treasures under the sound of your conversations,waiting forever for people to change.rest easy release me and ill work a labor of love stacking heartbreak on the shelves of our larder,close the door and ill lay stunned wondering forever am i good enough?No.all id like my darling is to do right by you and let the garden grow given room watering and time to bloom bearing infinite pedals of purple and gold

I look at your face and want it with every ounce of my being too bad youll soon know what im thinking of what it is im seeing,too lazy stoned or stupid to make good or bad happen,ill dig myself deeper and learn to love the entrapment.there is a certain image invented by my own delusion,a visage of these sheer rock walls lit by a setting sun,and well stand atop it holding hands,and know one will really mind what a freak i am